What's Old?

Hi there,
I've been wondering how old is old and I suppose it stems from the fact that my next birthday will be my 62nd. Wow, I used to think 62 was old, well, I thought 60 was old...when I was in my 20s. And here I am, anticipating my 62nd birthday and thinking, how old is old? The older I get, the further away "old" age becomes. In my 20s, I thought the 60s was old, in my 40s, well, 70s was old, and now that I'm approaching 62 and my beloved is in his early 70s, that's not old at all. Hmmmm...I am beginning to believe that old adage that one is only as old as one feels. Which means sometimes I'm still in my 20s, and then other times, feeling achy, I begin to think I'm old! Is it really simply a state of mind?
I like to say that we must keep on learning in order to stay fresh, green and growing. I ask myself, "When was the last time I did something for the first time?" Keeping a "beginner's brain" is important for me to stay engaged, growing and stimulated. If I am an expert in every aspect of my life, I'm not growing. So, I took my first curling lesson last week. Yes, curling, on ice, in the cold, throwing the stone, sweeping, the whole bit. And I was terrible at it! As I should be! It was the first time I ever tried the sport. My willingness to be awful at something, in public, with witnesses, is also a strength. It is my ability to be authentic, vulnerable, and look like a nube, a fool, at something, which is also the self confidence I have to learn in public, to be a beginner among others, in order to learn something new. I will not let the fear of appearing foolish stop me from experiencing something new. Hell, when it comes to looking foolish in public, well, that ship sailed years ago. LOL! We have all done silly things, and done them in public, so let's get over the "I don't want to embarrass myself" fear and just jump in and flounder a bit, flopping around on the ice, while we learn. Learning something new keeps us growing, keeps the brain stimulated and engaged, and keeps us forever young. So, you have to ask yourself, "How old is old?"

So, What Do You Do on Your Day Off?

Tuesday is my day off. I do things like play tennis, go to a movie, perhaps take a walk in a park, maybe go to a museum. Stuff like that. Most of the time I'm doing stuff for Vision. Take today, for example. I'm shopping for cloth to create wall hangings in the sanctuary to soften the sound in the room. The movement of sound waves within an enclosed space is an interesting science. It is beneficial to have experts who can advise about these things. I love what they do. Me? I'm just trying to make it look pleasing to the eye.
When I'm out shopping, I look for things that can add to the beauty of our Vision space. I look for things that make life more convenient, and I purchase things that make the space more functional. So, even when I'm off, I'm on.
Some career paths are like that. Some, when we punch out for the day, we can forget all about the company and do whatever we desire. What's your day off like?

All These Feelings

I am all too familiar with the cascade of emotions after the horrific events of Sunday morning. The grief, the sadness, the overwhelming feeling of despair. Everything about it is all too familiar. The lone shooter, innocent victims, inconsolable families and friends, and the easy availability of semi-automatic weapons. And we are still doing the same thing - nothing. I thought something would change, my God, something would have to change after a lone, deranged killer shot up an elementary school, killing children. Children! I thought, "Well, that's it. Americans won't stand for this. They will rein in the NRA and some sensible gun laws will follow." But, no. Not even then. What the hell. And here I am, with all these feelings.
When I first heard about the carnage in Orlando, I was sickened, horrified. I felt that wave of unrelenting sadness that washes over us when we hear about yet another mass shooting. Where do you go with that kind of grief? How do relieve that level of pain? I went to my spiritual center, then I went to my Spiritual Center, Vision. How comforting it is to be among like-minded individuals who hold each other aloft. It is a safe space into which we can pour our grief and share our heartbreak. I went to the LGBT Center the next day, where hundreds gathered for a candlelight vigil. It is another safe space to pour out one's pain and be held close. We walk through this together. All these feelings. I've heard that joy shared is multiplied and sorrows shared are lessened, I'm not sure about that, but it felt good to be among others who shared my pain.
So, now I'm pissed. And the same questions come up. Where do I go with these feelings? How do I relieve this level of outrage? I feel so helpless to change things, and I think that's where the anger comes from. How can we stand by day after day, week after week, month after month and watch as the tally of mass shootings steadily rise? I know it is a complex issue, I know there is no "one-size-fits-all" answer. I recall the quote by H.L. Mencken, "For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple and wrong." But I also know that to do nothing is an answer we can no longer afford. At Vision, we are reminded that faith without works is dead. We are to pray and move our feet. We know that we are the arms and legs, feet and hands of Spirit in action. And that's the key, action. Spirit can only do for us what it can do through us, so we must move. What that means to you, you must decide. Pray first, then, I'm not telling anyone what to do, but do a little something to make a difference. If that means an email to a politician, a phone call to representative, a letter to Capitol Hill, whatever it is, it will make a difference. It helps us with all these feelings. I know it is a complex issue and I know we have to start somewhere, make one decision, address it one phase at a time, do one thing that can lessen the chance of this happening ever again. We simply cannot do nothing and keep reliving all these feelings.
    

Welcome to 2016

Some things change, some things remain the same. Nah, scrap that. All things change. Well, all things at the physical level change. Take my weight. It changes. I eat more and exercise less and I store potential energy as fat. No big surprise there. Eat less, move more and I take off some weight. It's just that simple. No tricks, no diets, no fad eating routines, just simple calorie consuming and calorie burning. How does that turn into a multi-billion dollar a year industry? I think some people, maybe many people, want a quick fix, a magic pill, a secret code to instantly lose weight. How many New Year's resolutions have you made, year after year, that involved taking off that extra weight you've been carrying around on you?  On January 1st, there we are, all geared up and ready to starve ourselves into our new sleek, slim, sexy, attractive bodies. I just need to loose 40 pounds by the end of the month and I'll be happy...Well, okay then, can we make it more unrealistic? And here's what happens...by the second or third week of January, when we have fallen off the diet bandwagon more than once, we give up. Someone said that she wants to open a gym and call it Resolutions, and for the first month it operates as a gym and then for the rest of the year, it's a bar.  Hilarious, and it's funny because it's reality.
Anne Lamott once told her therapist that she was starting a diet at the 1st of the year and her therapist replied, "Oh, good, how much weight do you intend to gain?" That's the way it usually goes, right? Lose weight, fall away, gain it back and then some. So, what's the point, you ask? Why bother?
That's why resolutions don't usually work. When we fall off the plan more than once, twice, three times, instead of starting again in the next new moment, we chuck the whole idea. We doom ourselves to the inevitability of our past habits instead of lovingly continuing to correct and create the new habit.
So, no more resolutions, just self love and acceptance. When I intend to drop a few pounds I'll eat less, exercise more. If I keep the goal in mind, out in front of me, I can continue to make little baby steps toward it. Do what's in front of me to do, and keep the big, hairy, audacious goal in mind. In 12 months, who knows?

You Know What's Up?

You know what's up for me today? The NFL Draft. Yeah, I know, not very spiritual but very much like our experience of life. Remember when, as kids, we stood around the gymnasium or the ball field or the dirt lot, picking teams? Were you one of the first picked? The valuable kid who can make the runs, score the touchdown or create the winning play? Were you one of the vast middle bunch of kids who were thought to have some potential? Or were you one of the last of the last picked? Fine, we'll take him/her. You know the dead weight, the kid nobody wanted on his/her team, the loser. In the NFL Draft, the last aspiring college player hoping to get drafted by an NFL team is called Mr. Irrelevant. Nice. And the 39th pick of the 7th round, the 256th pick overall of the 2015 NFL Draft, the Arizona Cardinals pick...Mr. Irrelevant. Dictionary definition of Irrelevant - not relating or pertinent to the matter at hand; not important. Like I said, nice.
Here's what's up for me...no one is irrelevant. Not one person can be considered irrelevant. Each and every person here is here for a reason. We are born to make manifest the glory of Spirit in some individual way that only we can. Don't ever let anyone convince you that you are irrelevant. Spirit creates, that's what it does and it saw fit to create you for amazing things. Be your authentic self, do your thing, create your dreams, scale your mountains, walk your path, proudly, individually, as only you can do.
And that goes for you, Mr. Irrelevant of 2015, Tight End Gerald Christian, out of Louisville. There is nothing irrelevant about you.

A Day We Remember

March 5, 2001...gun shots...sirens...phones ringing off the hook...hearts pounding...parents crying...wandering around the Albertson's parking lot looking for their kids, their friend's kids, any kids they know...high school students hugging, gripping each other tightly, not letting go for anything...teachers in shock, doing everything and anything they can...police, EMTs, counselors all mobilizing to be of support...a small community, Santee, changed forever...families devastated...2 dead, Randy Gordon and Brian Zucker, 13 wounded...and the reverberations of that horrible act continue to this day...
March 5, 2014...flowers are placed on the Santana High School sign in front of the school...13 years later and the grief, sorrow and pain are still present in abundance...time does not heal all things...I cry and I pray and I long for the ability to forgive but it does not come...not yet...it takes more time than it's been and I'm still angry...

Moving - One of the Top Ten Stressors

So, VISION moved into its new digs the first week of August. It's been a process of unpacking and trying to find places for things. Our office space is smaller by about 300 square feet so we are trying to move three offices into two. We are in the process of creating two classrooms that can serve both children on Sunday mornings and adults during the week, daytime and evenings. It's quite a process. Everyone is pulling together to come up with creative ways to store things and serve the community. I know we are in the right place at the right time and we are poised to grow and thrive in our new space. It's fun, exciting, scary, overwhelming, and challenging to make a space that is inviting, friendly, warm, and uncluttered, neat, clean and welcoming. We are making a place to come and transform, to laugh, to grow, to hear great music, to see wonderful plays, to experience transcendent moments, and to bond with fellow VISION members. We are the place to come to transform your life by using these spiritual principles in your daily life. I have to say that the process of moving is one of the top ten stressors of living. One of the symptoms of the type of stress moving brings up in us is that it magnifies us. By that, I mean that the highest aspects of our being goes higher and the lowest aspects of our being goes lower. So, moving tends to bring out the best and the worst in our tendencies. Take that and couple it with our coping behaviors when stress goes up and we have an ideal environment to practice the principles we teach! I know for myself that when change comes up, I want to know how it comes out, and in my need to know, I exercise control as a coping mechanism over the change itself. What are the coping mechanisms you use? Some of us withdraw, some of us avoid, some of us control, some of us get angry. We all have some habit behavior we use when the stress of change invades our personal space. I would invite you to look at the habit behavior you express when stress invades your space. What do you do? Who or what do you blame? What do you use to deflect the stress? How do you cope with the change? All change is a call for us to see our world as bigger, more beautiful, more expansive, more supportive than ever before. We are called to do our work. We are not victims of our circumstances, our jobs, our government, our family or anything else at the physical level. We are free to experience the joy of being alive, and the simple pleasures of life are the living of it.